Mistakes to Avoid During Divorce

1. Lack of Communication. Of course, there are a lot of emotions when going through a divorce. It may be easier to deal with these emotions if you do not speak to the other party. However, shutting down communication or communicating disrespectfully can be detrimental to a custody case. When children are involved, the court expects the parents to communicate regularly and civilly. If you are unable to communicate with the other party, you can do so through your attorney.

2. Setting Out for Revenge. Regardless of the reasons for the divorce, if you view the other party as your enemy and set out to “get even,” this is likely to delay settlement in your case. Kansas is a “no fault” divorce state, which means that the Court is not going to consider the reasons for the divorce, no matter how egregious. Being able to maintain a level head and discuss a reasonable settlement will benefit you and help keep your legal fees down.

3. Having Unrealistic Expectations. Regardless of what you may see on television, no one profits from a divorce. Anyone who enters into a divorce with the idea that they are going to leave the marriage in a better financial position than they were in during the marriage is going to be disappointed. In most cases, parties in a divorce struggle to adjust to supporting a one-income household after living in a two-income household or to support two households on one income. If you did not work during the marriage, you should plan on finding employment during your divorce.

4. Not Having a Specific Parenting Plan. When asked what parenting plan they are requesting, parties often make the mistake of saying, “We can work that out later,” or “They can see the kids whenever they want.” While the sentiment behind these ideas is commendable, the reality is that this leaves you without a clear parenting plan if you cannot agree on parenting time after the case is finalized. In most cases, parties with open-ended or vague parenting plans end up returning to court later to request a more specific schedule

5. Not Hiring a Good Attorney. Some attorneys are more focused on negotiating amicable settlements, while others are known for being contentious. While a confrontational attitude may seem appealing on television, this attitude will generally only lead to additional hearings, delayed settlement, and expensive legal fees. However, you also do not want an attorney who is not capable in the courtroom when a hearing is necessary. A good attorney is going to have a good balance of qualities and the capability to do what is needed in your case, whether that is negotiating a settlement or taking your case to trial.

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